Reasons why being Single is becoming more desirable

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I believe people want to find love, they want to be adored, cared for, and have someone they can rely on, not necessarily because they need someone. I believe that men will always be men and women will be women, wired for desires and wants in different measures, neither is better nor worse. They are just different.

But it would appear that in this new era, more women believe they can do better and be better than men. But by doing this over and over, women are squashing the strength of men and sending the wrong signal that they do not need anyone with the “I can do it myself” attitude. A man knows when a women can do it herself but it gives a feeling of trust and reliability when you let a man be the man. A successful relationship is a team, and teams only win if they work together towards a common goal. In this case, a happy life.

Marriages will continue to diverge by education and exposure. There is an entire wave of social evolution that is flowing over us, and unfortunately it’s washing away what we have always referred to as ‘happy relationships’ which is now giving the singles confidence to remain so. It is a fallacy that remaining single is anyone’s desire. Even the worst of introverts still appreciate the presence of that one special person – maybe not all the time.

Let’s explore a few of those reasons why being single is becoming more desirable.

1) Marriage is still that same old patriarchal institution

Marriage is not simply an expression of love between two people. It is a legal and social institution which exists to benefit men and control women. Truth or fallacy?

2) Marriage is crippling

While some want to acquire and achieve before marriage (that is in the class of men), others believe in marrying humble, starting life really (and that’s in the class of women). For either of the category we belong to, any unmet expectations becomes as a result of “marriage”. Remember that what you allow is totally up to you.

3) Marriage is totally isolating

A lot of people, both men and women, claim they never felt lonelier than when they were married. It isn’t about seeing the other person everyday but there’s the belief that things change when you get married. Again, what you allow is totally up to you, except you see a different scenario in the future, then it’s worth keeping alive.

4) The sex stops being good

Both men and women have tendencies to grow tired of the same thing every day or every other day. This is where the need to reinvent comes in, otherwise, it’s not the sex that’s going to stop being good, it’s the marriage that will eventually be affected.

5) When you’re not married, you can leave at any time

If only marriage was a temporary contract, perhaps there might be a more appealing approach to it. But there are certain beauties you don’t get to enjoy until you have passed the test. That’s the only time you get to win the trophy.

6) Weddings are overrated

Some people get married in anticipated of beautiful things – the wedding night, the happily ever after. But we’re all too quick to see the flip side of the fairy tale.

Some people say you don’t need another person to make you happy because as you are responsible for your own happiness, but even though your happiness does not completely depend on you having a life partner, your world does become a much happier place to live in with the presence of a loved one.

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11 thoughts on “Reasons why being Single is becoming more desirable

  1. The truth is that no woman really desire to remain single, different stages in life attract different wants and aspiration which is defined by age. Socialization, the bane of modern madness particularly in a circular world where mediocrity is termed excellent, a situation where falsehood has beclouded sense of reasoning, now everything wrong is termed In Vogue,such as Baby mama etc. However, marriage is instituted based on mutuality, sincere purpose and true love, anything aside these is No Marriage.
    Well done bae.

  2. Everyone to his or her own opinion. Being married for more than three decades ( to the same person), I can counter each one of your points above but that’s not the point I want to make. Believe more in “live and let live” policy.
    Enjoyed reading.

  3. “It is a legal and social institution which exists to benefit men and control women.”

    I don’t agree. Perhaps it is the way I have seen my parents marriage work out and my very own nature.

    Marriage should be between two individuals who can think and make decisions independent of the other person though the partner needs must also be considered.

    That a woman cooks for her husband doesn’t make the marriage male dominated…etc.

    Have you ever thought Buki, why homes are controlled by men? Well, the women we have today are complacent. They don’t want to be bothered about many things that should run in there family. They keep pushing it to the man. Then one day, the women realize that the men have had to much control and then they fight back in the most uncalculated manner. They begin to get tags from their husbands like rebellious, stubborn, selfish etc. Women should have a voice and not allow a male species to ride roughshod over them all in the name of being married.

    1. I agree that women tend to naturally take the back sit which is an old habit. But if we must stay in the old ways, then let’s accept everything that comes with it, otherwise, there’s no point crying wolf when in trying to marry the old and the new, the sense of purpose and self is lost. Singles tend to look for any reason and others to justify their reasons in taking certain decisions. I’m merely trying to leave the obvious excuses out there and let them make better informed decisions.
      Thanks for your generous comments. :*

  4. I see your points and could try to counter them with mine. What you enumerate is a fact for many. If truth be told, marriage comes with its burdens, then again, if we took off all the challenges that go with the territory, I guess it won’t be the same anymore. This would make an interesting debate.

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