Many people believe that long distance relationships are never going to work out. It’s not going to be easy as well because the extra distance makes many things unachievable. Things could get complicated, and you could get sad and lonely. However, the extra distance also makes the simplest things the sweetest like being able to hold the other person’s hand, eating together at the same table, feeling each other’s touch, taking a walk together, smelling each other’s scent. These small wishes could suddenly mean so much more in a long distance relationship. Long distance relationship does have to be tough but it has its own pitfalls too.
To keep your love alive and strong, here are some tips to make your long distance relationship work:
- Avoid excessive communication.
It is unwise to be overly possessive. You don’t really have to communicate 12 hours a day to keep the relationship going. Many couples think they need to compensate for the distance by doing more. This is necessarily not true. And it might only make things worse. Less is more. You might only be exhausting yourselves unduly. It’s really about teasing at the right moments and tugging at the right spots.
- Set some ground rules to manage your expectations.
I don’t know why intending married couples feel the need to keep this topic at bay. Both of you need to be clear with what you expect of each other during this long distance relationship. This may be one of the best times you’ll ever have to set some ground rules so that none of you will do things that will take the other party by surprise.
- Make your communications creative.
While some may argue that greeting each other “good morning” and “good night” every day may be cheesy, it often sends a warm message to your special one. Try to update your partner on your life and its happening as well, this is aimed at bringing you closer and more involved in each other’s schedules. Send each other pictures, audio clips and short videos from time to time too. These will form the memories you will cherish in the nearest future. By putting in this kind of effort, you make the other person feel loved and attended to.
- Give room for some sexting
Sexual tension is undoubtedly one of the most important things between couples. Conservative ladies often feel like a sex toy when their partners try to start them on sexting and this builds tension between couples. If you know each other well enough, of course you should know when to introduce and express such sexual desires. Besides is like a glue that keeps both parties intimate while miles apart. Not only is sex a biological need, it is an emotional one as well.
- Do similar things
Recommend books, movies, music etc. to each other. When you read, watch and listen to the same things, you get to have more topics in common to talk about. This is a good to create some shared experiences even though you are living apart.
- Make visits to each other.
Visits are the highlight of every long distance relationship. After all the waiting and yearning and abstinence, you finally get to meet each other to fulfill all the little things like kissing, holding hands, etc. This is so very special and extra intimate for people in long distance relationships. It will be like fireworks, glitter bombs, confetti, rainbows and butterflies everywhere.
- Have a goal in mind.
Of course you don’t to waste your time hoping on a relationship that’s not going anywhere. So you need to ask, ‘What do we want to achieve at the end of the day?’ ‘How long are we going to be apart?’ ‘What about the future?’ The truth is, no couple can be in a long distance relationship for forever. Eventually we all need to settle down.
So make a plan with each other. Do up a timeline, marking down the estimated times apart and times together, and draw an end goal. It is important that you two are on the same page and have the same goals. So that even if you are not living in the same space and the same time zone, both of you are still working together in the same direction towards a future that includes one another.
- Know each other’s schedules
It’s helpful to know when the other person is busy and when he/she is free, so that you can drop a text or make a call at the right time. You wouldn’t want to disturb your partner when he/she is in the middle of class or halfway through a business meeting. Know the small and big events that are taking place or will take place in each other’s life, for example, important business trips and meetings, job interviews and etc.
- Stay positive
When everyone else is saying this won’t work, you are in it because you believe it’s going somewhere so you need to be constantly injecting positive energy into the long distance relationship to keep it alive. Yes, the waiting can be painful and you can sometimes feel lonesome but you need to remind yourself that the reward at the end will be worth every hour spent waiting. One good trick to staying positive is feeling loved at all times. When you know someone somewhere adores you, that’s more positive energy that engaging in other trials and error.
More importantly, be thankful that you have someone to love who also loves you back.