The Beauty in her Innocence

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When Ruth loved, she loved truly and expected much in return. She gave her all and held nothing back and because she loved in innocence and loyally, she thought it would be a seamless love relationship until Taye broke up with her for fear of loving her too much. He was sure he would lose himself and his mind the way he loved her. The love should have been perfect because they both loved each other in their own understanding but Taye loved in fear because Ruth seemed like the beautiful peacock with the most beautiful feathers that all the other boys liked to hover about to see. Hence, he doubted his love. Taye doubted his love would be enough for her but she wanted only him. She told him in very few words because she didn’t know how to speak falsely. When she said it while looking into his eyes when they were mixed with love – that was it. Yet it wasn’t enough for him, for his family and friends too had their reservations about Ruth which she was unable to shake off Taye.
Till he broke off the relationship, she was unable to salvage her love. Because she loved him so and was a girl of little words, she thought she would honorably let him go. So by doing this, she became a shadow of herself, wondering about, hoping Taye would realize his mistake and come back to her. But he didn’t come back to her, at least not in the capacity that she wanted him. When he began to date some other girl, he still sought friendship in Ruth and because she had hoped he would come back, she couldn’t stop him from encroaching on her time, privacy and heart. She enjoyed that he still preferred her to his new girlfriend. This continued and Ruth seemed happy, somehow Taye was still in her life.
But when he was becoming too comfortable with keeping her and other girls simultaneously, she didn’t like that she had to share him even though he didn’t belong to her. She was upset that he had eaten his cake and was still having it. So Michael, Taye’s friend, walked up to her at an outing Taye had taken her to. Apparently, he had told Michael that Ruth had been his girlfriend but they were no more. So Michael began to engage Ruth in a way she found offensive. She was heartbroken that all their relationship had meant nothing to him and he would easily trade her. She thought that if he could cheapen their love in that manner, then she would give him a dose of his own medicine.
Michael was charcoal black with reddish brown eyes and dark-edged colored teeth. Even though he was black, he had a funny accent. Ruth found his appalling so say the least but if he was what would get Taye’s attention, then two can play that game.
Ruth encouraged Micahel to visit her, take her out and accompany her to events were someone had known her together with Taye. Before long, Taye heard of their gallivanting. She asked her nonchalantly on one occasion and she had answered him the truth when she said, “There’s nothing between me and Michael” but then again like always, he didn’t believe her. Unlike before too, she didn’t bother to convince him that she was speaking the truth. Until when he called her to meet up one afternoon.
“I thought you said there is nothing between you and Michael. Why did you lie to me?”
“I didn’t lie to you”, Ruth didn’t look nor sound convincing.
“Look at this”.
He had forwarded a text he found on Michael’s outbox text messaging to his phone and showed it to her. It read:
“You are such a lovely and gentle girl. I would really like to take you to meet my family back in Ghana. It felt good when I held her hand at the airport today. I look forward to see you tomorrow”.
She read it, giving nothing away and handed his phone back to him.
“What was that about?” he demanded angrily.
“He said he had a friend to pick up at the airport and he didn’t want to go the long drive alone. He pleaded, I was free and I accompanied his drive”, she explained unsurely.
“I don’t believe you. How could you be seeing my friend? And he held her hand? When did that start?”
Ruth said nothing. She had nothing to say anyway. Taye was reaping the works of his own doing so what was the fuss about. He gave Michael the impression he was through with her, passing her like she was some sort of ball to be tossed about.
“That was how I saw a sent text on Damien’s phone to her, commending you for being an extraordinary lady. What does that mean anyway?” Taye yelled.
“I am not your friends who decide on their own that they want to send me messages in whatever words they deem fit. It takes two to commit a crime anyway”, she matched his high-pitch.
“Yes, it does because you also sent him a text calling him sweetheart. When did you ever refer to me as sweetheart?”
Ruth said nothing. She laughed inside her. Damien was Taye’s very best friend. Surely he should trust him even if he doesn’t trusted Ruth. She was appalled by his insinuations but she was in no mood to justify her reason for being friendly with his best friend. So what ought to have been a friendly breakup between Ruth and Taye, because she didn’t have the courage to move on past him ended up being one of many messy insinuations to come.
When Ruth was asked how she felt about it all, she said “I would do it all again because I knew nothing of his accusations and insinuations. I am innocent then and I wouldn’t trade that time in my life for all the loveless relationships in the world”.

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2 thoughts on “The Beauty in her Innocence

  1. I read this post a couple of times and all I feel is sadness….. Sadness at the immaturity with which a very rare gift (true love) was carelessly thrown into the bin of “could have; would have; should have” all very useless now… I feel a bit of anger at Ruth and Taye too, I am not sure if it was pride or stupidity (forgive my language – just being real) that plagued them both. I learnt a very long time ago that life is not fair, you need to hold life by the collar, shake it again and again, until it gives you what you want! Nothing great comes from a comfort zone. In Ruth’s shoes, I would have fought for the love of my life with my last breath – especially as there was no real opposition anywhere in sight! just two silly youngsters who refused to recognize the treasure bestowed on them even when it was staring them right in the face! (sigh!!!) Anyways, all that is in the past now ( I believe?) life must go on. In my dialect – Yoruba, they would say “eni ti a ba sun ti, la n ja arunpa lu” rough translation is “When one is tossing and turning during sleep, its the closest person to you that gets hit”. They need to live ( and I mean LIVE) and make the best of it with whoever they eventually ended up with. Shikenah!!

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